30 Random Thoughts for 30 Weeks of Pregnancy!

This is a day early!

This comes after reading two friends blogs who posted random things to know about them..which I think I may still do one week! But I thought it would be fun to take my own twist on it and post my most inner thoughts on pregnancy..some outrageous, some odd, some hormonal and some just thought provoking. So you ask, what occupies a 30 week pregnant girl's brain...read on if you dare! These come in no particular order! And I feel like these do not even hit on half of my crazy thoughts!

1. I wonder what Baby Brown will look like. Who's eyes, smile, and features will you have? What color hair will you have, heck are you a boy or a girl?...This occupies most my time!

2. I hope you have a good combination of both of us but I would be excited if you had your daddy's smile, dimples and eyes...he is a good lookin' guy after all!

3. I wonder what your personality/temperament will be like.

4. Will I miss being pregnant? I think I will miss taking you every where with me and feeling you move all day long. You are a part of me and I love taking you everywhere!

5. Will my hormones ever return to normal and will I ever have a day without feeling irritable, happy, and teary eyed all within a short time span of each other? I cry all the time!

6. I hope I can kick my sweet craving after pregnancy as I have never had one before. Will you love sweets and juice since that is what I crave?

7. If I am going to deliver at 38 weeks, we need to avoid Friday, May 13th!

8. You are kicking me right now and you feel like a twisting ninja..I wonder what you are thinking while squirming around in there!

9. Will I ever feel sane again? I am pretty sure Chris is praying I do soon! Between my intense nesting urge and raging hormones I am a tough cookie to live with at times I am sure. I want to organize, reorganize, clean and reclean everything! And the smallest of thing can put me in a horrible mood or make me cry! Lord, please help!

10. Hmm, what sweets do we have in our pantry for after dinner...not what I want I don' think! Again, see number 6!

11. I wonder if you will be colicky.

12. Will I ever feel rested again? Lately I feel like I am in the first trimester again and feel like a walking zombie. I am tired all. the. time. Never rested! At least I know when you get here it will be all worth it because holding you is priceless and sleep deprivation is all worth it to me to have you in my arms!

13. I have gotten spoiled with Chris cleaning, doing laundry and cooking..I sure hope it stays this way!

14. I wonder if my body will ever feel back to normal again and like it belongs to me.

15. But in the same sense, I think I will kind of miss having a belly to be protective over, rest my hands on and touch all the time.

16. Is it bed time yet?

17. I think I will miss maternity pants..I forget what buttons and zippers are like.

18. I wonder if I could get away with wearing some of my comfy shirts or pants for those "fat" feeling days after you are born. I know 1 thing, I will miss wearing Daddy's sweats as those are the only thing that fits these days.

19. I never had a clue as to how much your body changes through pregnancy....I will stop there. Many of the "changes" are ones I will spare you all of going into detail with...plus I know my dad and father in-law read this and that would just be awkward! But lets just say, it is a miracle your body knows how to grow a human and does the things it needs to do. But to witness these changes is just crazy. Things I never dreamed of happen..almost scary! What your body goes through to incubate a grow a human is miraculous and weird all at the same time!

20. I wonder if nursing will be as hard as I am thinking it will be. This is probably my biggest worry about pregnancy. All my dreams about you revolve around me trying to nurse you and you look like a 8 month old in all my dreams! So yes, this occupies my mind a lot. But I am hopeful with a great support system (thank you do a dear friend who has already "taught" me a lot), some reading I have done and just some good ol' trial and error with you and me kiddo, I think we can figure it out!

21. You will be the oldest in our family...will you have the typical "oldest" personality? Or will you be a jealous older sibling like I was when my brother was first born? Don't worry baby B, if you are..I understand!

22. Will you ever know how much I love you? And do you know who I am already?

23. No, you will never know how much I love you...I can not imagine how much my love will continue to grow because of how much I already love you. I know it will multiply to unimaginable lengths, but my heart already has grown so much.

24. Will I be a good mom? Am I already being a good enough mom and taking good enough care of you each day?

25. How can I ever protect you from all the bad and harm in the world? Can you be the next bubble boy/girl?? Worry should be my middle name. I already worry about all the potential bad things out there.

26. I feel like pregnancy has already changed a lot of who I am and can not wait to see how else you transform each your dad and I and our new family.

27. I am nervous about feeding, bathing, and caring for you. Ok nervous is not the best word, but I worry about things like..do we dress you in long sleeves and pants to sleep in, how do I know you have eaten enough and about a million other little questions. Again, see number 25!

28. I can not wait until I can roll over, get off the couch or bed, and basically just move without letting out a groan, huff or getting out of breath! Seriously, I have to catch my breath after climbing stairs. Turns out you are occupying most my breathing room!

29. Hearing your heartbeat and seeing you in ultrasounds is the perk of my week. There is nothing better than hearing your heartbeat. And each time it is like the first time and I often find myself saying, oh my gosh you are really in there, we are really going to meet you soon and we are really having a baby! I think I am still in shock that this is happening and it has not hit me that we created YOU!

30. I love being pregnant! It is the happiest I have ever been. And I want you to know Baby Brown, you have already made me the happiest I have EVER been and I can not wait for a lifetime with you!

I am fairly sure you are 3 pounds already as you almost were about a week ago! I go to the Dr. on Tuesday so we will see!

30 week update:

See the bigger picture.

How your baby's growing:

Your baby's about 15.7 inches long now, and she weighs almost 3 pounds (like a head of cabbage). A pint and a half of amniotic fluid surrounds her, but that volume will decrease as she gets bigger and takes up more room in your uterus. Her eyesight continues to develop, though it's not very keen; even after she's born, she'll keep her eyes closed for a good part of the day. When she does open them, she'll respond to changes in light but will have 20/400 vision — which means she can only make out objects a few inches from her face. (Normal adult vision is 20/20.)